Should interns get the keys to the social media machine? Weigh in here: http://scottwesterman.com/?p=1288

The public reply by Scott Westerman makes perfect sense, and I have to agree with the points he makes. To make things more simple, I figured I’d outline my take on my own blog, versus a comment on Scott’s.

I’ve had a fantastic “real-world” internship experience at AOL this summer. Do I want to stay there after I graduate? Well, I don’t know yet.  Either way, although I’m young and new to the corporate world, I’ve been trusted with some monstrous projects. I’ve been included in huge meetings. I’ve videoconferenced and emailed directly with AOL’s CEO, Tim Armstrong, and heads of two divisions, Media and Mobile.

One of said projects is, effectively, turning around the Twitter account and social media branding for my division, AOL Jobs. We’ve done some cool stuff so far, and my message to coworkers has been “personalization!” People like talking to people, not robots.

Our Twitter account was exclusively being handled by “Twitterfeed,” a website that links to your account and automatically posts tweets based on your blog’s RSS feed. Since AOL Jobs’ articles do comprise a RSS feed, it all worked.

Someone set this up at least a year ago, and they don’t work in the division anymore. We are trying to remove this “functionality” because it’s had devastating effects on our efforts. You see, Twitter is selective about search results, and trending topics, and so on. I’ve had to research their rules for “how to trend and show up in search” because we were not.

Long story short, if your account is exclusively automated, you will be banned from trending and search unless you submit a trouble ticket and ask nicely to be included again. And then you have to post things that are not automated to redeem yourself. That’s where I come in. It’s a work in progress, but we’re getting there.

So, Scott, why AREN’T you using an intern? Us young folks love this social media stuff – our iPhones, Droids and Crackberries are the first thing we see in the morning and the last thing we see at night. Really. You want a fresh perspective, get someone my age in with your company and have them handle Tweeting.

We know how to make things trend, how to effectively search, and how to say a whole lot of good things in just 140 characters. We do things now and don’t like to wait. We embody the concept of Twitter – at least, those of us who embrace it do. I admit, many of my friends still don’t “get it” – but those who do are using it effectively.

Sure, the intern crowd is young, but those of us who know our stuff are valuable and a great commodity to companies such as AOL and Ford Motor Company. I was hired specifically because AOL Jobs wanted a fresh perspective on what they’re doing this summer.

I really love what FMC is doing on Facebook, Twitter and so on. You guys are doing it well and you’re doing it right. It’s obvious that you, Scott, and those on your team really have a vision for what you want to accomplish, and believe in said vision as well as the company and its’ products.

I’m not sure how I feel about Detroit… but I have strong opinions on Twitter and yes, Ford, too.

So, Scott, what do you think of what I’m saying? You asked for perspective, so there’s mine. I hope it helps you and your interns out.

And by the way – I’m graduating in May and if you can’t tell, think your team is really knocking it out of the park. It would be great to chat with you sometime and see if I could add anything to the FoMoCo social media efforts and strategies post-graduation.

I’ve neglected to keep my own website up-to-date this summer. Work really plays a part – when I get home, I don’t want to sit down in front of my computer after spending eight hours at a computer. Either way, I have a free weekend, so I’m posting this and doing some work tomorrow, too.

I want to upgrade to WordPress 3.0, and change up my layout/theme. The current theme was custom-designed by yours truly. It was a massive undertaking and great learning experience. I don’t have the time to re-code a new theme, so I may let some other people take over. I found a great design from WooThemes, and with some tweaks, it may be what I am looking for.

Some updates on my life since beginning the internship with AOL:

New iToys
I purchased the new iPhone 4 on launch day – went to Fair Oaks and hung out with some other “defruited” friends in line. Had a great time and it’s been entertaining following the hoopla surrounding the antenna and things. Supposedly I’ll get a free Bumper case from Apple now, though whether or not I use it is yet to be seen.

I also acquired an iPad. No, I didn’t buy it. Rather, I won it on Twitter. I entered a Twitter contest to show someone on my team at work how they operated. The next Monday, I had a call from the nice people at Speck Products telling me that I had won their “iPad for Dad” giveaway! How cool is that… I never win anything, so it was pretty awesome. Thanks again, Speck, for the 16 GB iPad, two cases, $50 to iTunes, and free swanky T-shirt! So far, I haven’t devoted much time to finding cool, outside-the-box apps for it. My goal is to have it prepped for the fall semester at JMU, hopefully to use as a note-taking device in class.

Car Parts
With a “big boy job” such as my AOL internship comes a “big boy paycheck” every two weeks. It’s been a huge help/relief to have steady money coming in – and that is definitely a plus for graduating and getting a good job. I like expensive things, and I like paying for them myself.

So, with these paychecks, I’ve put a little bit of money into the Miata to keep everything up to spec. I had been making a list of the small things I wanted, that were not critical, to replace in due time. I finally ordered and installed a majority of the parts. New shift boots, dipstick, washer fluid system and PCV system, to name a few.

Next up is a set of V-Maxx coilovers from Flyin’ Miata. I need to call and clarify a few things on Monday before I order them. It should be a great replacement and upgrade from the tired stock suspension pieces.

This AOL Internship
Okay, okay, enough about cars and iPads, what about the sweetest part of my summer, my internship? Well, it’s been a blast so far. I’ve met some really great people and my team is small but focused. AOL as a whole is focusing all of their efforts this summer into completely turning the company around. They helped bring the Internet to the masses back in the day, sort of lost their focus with Time Warner in the early 2000’s, and now they’re focusing on content.

This is a monumental time to be interning with the AOL team. I feel very fortunate to have earned the internship, and am trying hard to meet people through those I already know while I am with AOL. The interns had a video conference with Tim Armstrong, the CEO, and he encouraged us to email him with suggestions for the Mobile team. I emailed him at 4:00 that afternoon (for the record, it was a Friday) and he replied back within the hour. What a guy. He also forwarded my suggestions on to two other executives, Brad Garlinghouse (director of mobile) and David Eun (director of media). They both thanked me directly as well. David Eun happened to be in the Dulles office this past Thursday, and I got to meet him in person – again, a great opportunity.

I’m not sure what will happen after I head back to JMU on August 20, but I’ve really had a great time so far.

Other Happenings
I’m trying to get in touch with David Harris at Mazda, and Scott Monty at Ford. They are the two heads of social media management for their respective companies. I admire what both companies have done in the social realm as of late, and it’d be so great to be able to get a phone call or email with either (or both) of them and find out how to join their team after I graduate. We’ll see what happens regarding getting in contact. Hmm.

OK, this is long enough… hopefully a new design will happen in the next few days!

It’s time to pack up and clean up at Pheasant Run for the rest of the summer. Get rid of old food in the fridge and freezer, vacuum, do some laundry, and disconnect the internet among other things.

Working with newly-admitted SMAD students has been a lot of fun – kind of similar to my time at Apple teaching One to One members, but focusing exclusively on media creation applications. And just as with One to One, everyone learns at a different pace. Some see things more logically, whereas others are likely to get flustered or confused easily. Regardless, they all seem to be finishing up their projects and doing well.

I’m looking forward to heading home on Sunday evening and starting with AOL bright and early on Monday. I spent some time figuring out my finances today. Between my two summer jobs, I will be able to (finally) pay off what little remains on the Miata, do some nice upgrades, and have a good bit of savings to bank as well.

My feelers are also out for a BMW 5-series of the E34 variety – so 1989 to 1995. My long-term goal is, and has been, to purchase a second car and make the Miata more track-oriented. If I have a comfortable daily driver, then it won’t matter if the suspension rides really rough. So… if I come across a decent condition E34 with a manual transmission (a must) that is not black (two black cars would be torture to keep clean) and is a good price, I may snag it this summer.

Well, time to close out of the lab and hit up BDubs for 55¢ wing night. It’s been real, SMADdies. On to BDubs, autocross, and AOL!

I’m currently down in Harrisonburg, where I’ve been working two jobs for SMAD throughout Maymester. Maymester – for those not versed in all-things JMU – is a four-week class session where students may take one or two classes. The workload is much more intense, but it’s a great way to stay in town a bit longer, and earn class credit while you’re here.

My Maymester experience has been a bit different. I’m not taking classes. Rather, I’m working as a student assistant for the SMAD 201 and 202 introductory courses. So, I’m in the labs helping the 201/202 students outside of class hours. They have a great deal of software and concepts to master in four short weeks, so I’m doing my best to be available and answer questions. Adobe Creative Suite is not the easiest thing to pick up so quickly.

I’m also working on converting old sound effects to digital files. This is a project for one professor, who sourced the effects from Hollywood Studios in California. They date back to the 1970s and are on reel-to-reel tape. It’s tedious, and some of the sounds are just un-usable by now, but it’s also been an interesting experience in the realm of conversions. Later this summer, I’m planning on converting some of my dad’s old Betamax tapes (yes, those) to digital files, along with our family’s VHS tapes.

Speaking of heading to mom and dad’s… that’s what I’m doing after Maymester ends. I’ve been hired as an intern for AOL Jobs, which is a division of AOL, who is conveniently based out of Dulles, VA. AOL Jobs is a separate little entity, that helps users not only find a job, but improve their resumé and advance their career with helpful articles and resources. My duties will include web design and editing, copy editing, learning about search engine optimization (SEO) and perhaps some copy writing as well.

AOL seems to have a fantastic internship program and I am excited to get started! There are four other interns at the Dulles office, so I won’t be flying solo all summer. We are all working in different divisions, but I have a feeling we’ll also be collaborating quite a bit as well.

The internship starts on June 14th and lasts through the summer. When I’m not working at AOL – it’s full time and paid, which is awesome! – I’ll be spending the majority of my weekends either working track weekends or racing in autocrosses. There’s also, of course, a list of little projects that I’d like to tackle on the Miata as I have time. Nothing ground-breaking, but it’s all of the fixes and improvements that I’ve put off during the school year. Now that I have some time and tools, it’s a great opportunity to check some boxes.

So, there’s my update. I’m heading to Greenwich, CT with the Davids this weekend for the Greenwich Concours d’Elegance. They have gone multiple times and had a blast, so I’m looking forward to seeing some incredible history in the automobile world in a short two day span.

Dear Mr. Thiewes:

First, let me say that your letter is elegant and compelling. I hope you are receiving an A in the class.

Second, I hope my response is coherent, because I’ve spend eight hours on the road today. However, I felt you deserved a response this evening.

Third, I write this knowing you may share it with your class. That is fine, and I’ll let you decide how much to share, for some of what I will say I have not said in the Breeze forum in the interest of privacy for those who emailed me.

You may have noticed in the Breeze forum following the publication of my letter (the title was the Breeze’s), if you’ve followed it, that none of Springfest’s organizers have posted, no surprise, nor, to my knowledge, have any of the many students who take pride in JMU’s high party-school ranking in Playboy. Most of the posts and the private emails I’ve received from students have been pretty much like yours, though none so well reasoned. These are students who to participate in activities similar to yours; who are “right-thing doers.” Most of them, not you however, tended to view Springfest as a somewhat isolated incident, and they focused on distancing themselves from it. Springfest was, I believe, an extreme example of what happens every weekend to a lesser extent, a burst boil that leaves the infection behind (I know, terrible metaphor). JMU has a terrible alcohol problem, worse than most people think, and most people think it is very bad. I know this because, through family circumstance, I know several of the people who for years have delivered food to the student housing area. Every year they long for graduation and for most of the students to leave, even though during the summer months they make significantly less money. The stories they tell of student activities are appalling, so I take issue with your terms “vast majority” and “innumerable,” and that they’d rather make less money than enter the, as they call it, “debauchery zone,” gives their stories a great deal of credence.

Most of the students who emailed me or posted to the forum, including you, wanted me to acknowledge their contributions, for which indeed they should be proud. Most of their messages and yours also, subtly in many cases, rebuked me for treating them unfairly. I did. But (there’s always a “but”) was it fair that because of Springfest the terrified little girl of a faculty member living near student housing had to have the police take her home, because her grandmother couldn’t safely get to her house? This was a little girl who saw, according to her mother, more lewdness in that short trip up her street than her mother has seen in her life, and who wanted to attend JMU until April 10th. Was it fair to the student who last week was told during an internship interview that “We can’t take any JMU students at this time”? Still, I was unfair to you and others, and two unfairs don’t make a right or something like that. So I’ll get to that in a minute.

As I said, the hard-partiers-proud-of-the-party-school-reputation students, which I think are the majority of JMU students, though not a vast majority, didn’t comment on my letter, but not because they are hanging their heads in shame. Rather, they simply do not care, and they are waiting for the riot-generated spotlight to pass. We can’t expect from them any help in changing things. So I unfairly put the burden on students like you, that’s life, but if students like you don’t change things, don’t work to diminish JMU’s party-school reputation and by extension the amount of alcohol consumption, who will? The students not like you?

Some students who’ve contacted me have said the responsibility for changing things lies with the faculty and the administration. Maybe, but as I posted at one point, the faculty and the administration can only act punitively by either making sure students have a great deal less time on their hands and/or by moving closer to zero tolerance for alcohol related offenses, on and off campus.

However, in pondering what I’ve just said, you might want to ask yourself some questions. I see that you’re a junior, so in which year did you last have a MWF class, not MW, MWF? Do you have classes on MWF, on MWF at 8am, on MWF and TTH at 8am? Do you have late afternoon classes that meet on Fridays? Do you ever have assignments that require a whole weekend to complete more than three times in a semester? Have you since you’ve been here ever had to spend a great deal of time completing an assignment over Spring Break? If you answered “Yes” to my questions, would a significant number of your peers outside your major answer “Yes” as well? Do you spend at least two hours a week per credit hour of enrollment studying? Do your peers? I suspect you have a high GPA. Do some of your peers who work far less hard than you work and whose work is of a lower quality than yours have a similar or higher GPA?

I guess I never really apologized for treating you unfairly, but then you don’t need that, do you? You seem to know yourself.

Kenneth

Dr. Wright makes several blanket claims that frankly, are disappointing. While I understand his perspective, his bold statements come across as somewhat immature. As one classmate said, it’s as though he’s a parent that pulled the “ungrateful card” on their child. Following round-two of some intensely intelligent discussion in one of my classes, I felt compelled to email Dr. Wright with my perspective on his perspective. Enjoy.

Dr. Wright,

In discussing the Monday edition of The Breeze in class this afternoon, your guest editorial regarding Springfest was brought to the foreground. I feel compelled to write, not to ask for forgiveness or approval of what took place on April 10. Rather, I am writing because the tone and implication of some of what you wrote saddens me.

Your claim that “JMU is not your university; it does not belong to you” is one that was discussed in great detail today. The tone of that paragraph, as well as those that follow, is worrisome. The implication is that the student body is made up of guests, transient, ungrateful beings who do nothing more than attend classes, pay tuition, and earn degrees before progressing into the “real world.”

While I agree that James Madison University is no more mine than it is yours, it is also very much my university. A vast majority of students at this University are leaders, both on campus and in the greater Harrisonburg community. I am a leader of a club on campus, and in my short three years, have managed to not only change and expand my life, but the lives of others.

In “doing the right thing,” I have contributed to the happiness, spirit, and well-being of James Madison University and the city of Harrisonburg. While I have taken – the education, knowledge, and oft-thankless work of countless faculty and staff – I have also given back. Thus, I am proud to say that JMU is my university. I am not a guest in the city of Harrisonburg – rather, I am a proud resident and student of the community.

My time at JMU thus far has been nothing short of incredible. I have earned a world-class education, met amazing professors and lifelong friends, been active in numerous clubs and organizations, and yes, attended the occasional party. As a “right-thing-doer” in the JMU community, I have promoted the University to potential students and their parents, to businesses, to colleagues. James Madison University has a great reputation for academics, both in the caliber of the graduates and the professors who support and educate said grads

Your implication that college must be a strict four years of nothing but education worries me. College is about priorities, and I agree that education must come first. You are correct in claiming that we (students, parents, and lenders) are not technically paying for anything but the education.

However, the “college experience” that results from each student’s four years (give or take) in Harrisonburg is not strictly educational. It is a four-year period of growth, change, balance, and opportunity. The “real world” is not solely focused on work – rather, the focus is the drive to find balance between work and pleasure.

I believe I have found that balance, and that the majority of the James Madison student body has as well. I am not writing to explicitly invalidate your opinion. I am writing to ask that you consider and recognize the innumerable students who appreciate the value of their JMU experience and are grateful for their time in this city and at this University.

Respectfully,

Jake Thiewes
JMU Class of 2011

Well we weren’t drunk, but this weekend was full of driving and great music. Joey, Chad and I packed up and left Harrisonburg on Saturday morning. Chad and I dropped the top on the Miata and relentlessly began the pursuit of Joey’s M3. The intended route was to take I-81 south to Buena Vista, then hop on the Blue Ridge Parkway from there. Well, the Parkway was closed due to icing. So, we took Route 11 and got on the Parkway further south. Drove into Roanoke and met Adam Flint for lunch, then it was off to some great local roads for another four hours of 6,000 rpm in second gear.

Our final stop was Joey’s house in Bedford, where we met his parents and two (very affectionate) dogs. Dinner was good and the dogs took quite the liking to me and Chad. Attention, they liked it. We woke up this morning and spent a few hours chatting, drinking coffee and admiring the view. Chad and I left around 1:30, JMU-bound.

We decided to take Route 11 all the way up to Harrisonburg. The interstate is boring, and we had all day, so why not? As we left Joey in Buchanan, I commented to Chad how great a burger and milkshake would be, from some random diner. He vehemently agreed – and after 15 miles or so, we spotted the “Pink Cadillac Diner” on the side of the road, in Natural Bridge, VA. The bacon cheddar burger and chocolate shake were fantastic.

Chad drove the rest of the way back to Harrisonburg. I was pretty beat from Saturday’s stints behind the wheel, and he enjoyed the adult-sized go-kart from a new perspective. Of course, we had great music playing throughout the weekend, and took every opportunity to crank it and sing along. It was a great, great weekend, and I enjoyed getting to know Chad more too. Hopefully he feels like he’s made some friends in MM now, and isn’t just part of the car club.

I think this is how college is supposed to be. Hopefully the rest of my spring break goes just as well – I need to figure out my summer plans. Digico is an amazing opportunity, but it’s unpaid. My staying in Harrisonburg for the summer depends on finding some sort of income. Here’s hoping.

But whatever road you choose, I’m right behind you, win or lose. Forever young.

In driving the car around town, I noticed the idle getting progressively lumpier. Acceleration was taking a similar hit – the car felt like VTEC was kicking in and was surging badly. Yes, the M50 motor in the car does have Vanos (BMW’s term for variable valve timing) but the variances should not be noticeable to the driver. This was significant.

As I surfed forums and tried to come up with reasons why the car could be stumbling so badly, I was presented with a pretty impressive list of possibilities. Vacuum leak, bad O2 sensor, fuel filter, ignition coils, Vanos unit, etc. Some of the repairs would be cheap and others, not so much. I took a gamble when I ordered the power window regulators and picked up a new OEM fuel filter for $10. My thinking was that it would be good to replace regardless, and it can only help the car’s performance long-term.

Mentally, I was reviewing the first big wrench day on the car. Cabell put the ignition coils back on the motor, but I did notice something potentially amiss. I thought I remembered one of the coils looking somewhat… melted. Now, coils are not cheap. There is one for each cylinder, so we would need six. Pelican Parts – about the cheapest BMW parts supplier online – has them for $48.25 each. As I said, not cheap.

I struck gold with Rex, an MM alumni who lives in Northern Virginia. He had a set of six known-good coils, from a 1995 E34, that he would sell me for $50 total. Conveniently, I would be up in NoVA the next weekend and could pick them up. Done deal, I told him.

Today’s weather was (according to my iPhone) 45° and sunny. In reality, it was about 35° and windy with a hint of snow. I asserted my stubbornness against Mother Nature and installed the new coils anyway. After my 20 minute project, the Bimmer started right up. I pulled onto Main Street and gave it some gas. The surging was gone. The bad idle was gone. The motor is still good, after 195,000 miles. It pulls like a BMW Inline-6 should.

We’ll still be installing the new fuel filter, since I have the part. Between that, and fixing the power windows, I’d say we have our hands slightly full. We also need to re-connect the driver’s door lock mechanism. The key will only unlock the car from the passenger door. It’ll be a quick fix while we do the windows.

Hooray, progress!

Nothing more was said, and Jeff and I didn’t see each other except a quick “hey” in passing, if we ever saw each other around campus. I ran into him right before Thanksgiving break, and he mentioned that the car was running poorly and “some gasket” was the problem. I thought about it, and figured it could be a cool project for myself, as well as MM, to tackle.

My worry was that the “some gasket” would be the head gasket. On an old 525, the cost of repair isn’t worth it. Fortunately, he told me more of the story later, and it was the valve cover gasket. Easy. So… upon our arrival back at JMU for the spring semester, I took the key and his Orient Blue Bimmer back to my townhouse.

It needed more work than just the valve cover gasket. A quick hour-long drive revealed that. With close to 200,000 miles on the odometer, things had been going south for a while, and the car needed some upkeep. Jeff’s goal is to keep the car for another two years – at that point, he’ll be done with school and in a position to buy something newer.

My goal is to make the car last that two years.

I’ve said it before, but it’s worth repeating. The motorsport community is one of the most giving, willing, and able groups of people. Madison Motorsports is a great example of the camaraderie that I mention. Myself, plus four other MMers, got together this past Saturday and tackled the majority of the engine work. The work would not have been completed had I been working solo.

We aren’t done with the car yet. As Joey so eloquently put it when I picked it up, “it’s kind of a busted pile.” Well, yeah, it is. For now, it’s less busted and less of a pile. We are waiting on window regulators to come in at this point. The motor still idles and revs a bit rough, but it’s significantly smoother than my first drive. I’m wondering if it’s a vacuum leak or some other issue with coil packs, wires, etc.

More updates to come as we make progress and eventually finish the car. It’s great to have something on which to tinker. For me, it’s something about keeping an old car on the road – there’s a drive there, when you know the motor and transmission are good, it just needs a few parts to be reliable again. C’mon, you can’t scrap it just yet.

And if, at the end of this project, I know that one car was saved from the junkyard, and one owner could continue making memories with “their baby,” then it’s worth it for me.

If you want more to read until my next update on the E34, check out this Jalopnik comment thread. In short: car guys donated money to someone who was too broke to repair his beloved Honda. $1,200 later (for a $700 repair) and he’s back in business.

Step 1: Approaching Employees
When you enter a retail store, you are typically “browsing” or “need help.” Should you fall into the latter category, clearly you need to speak with an employee. They can generally be identified by say, bright red shirts and name tags. Should you need clarification, a quick, “Excuse me, you work here, right?” works nicely.

Now, on days such as December 26th, when the entire city of Fairfax is shopping at Fair Oaks Mall, stores may be very crowded. Do not fear! The stores have prepared and have numerous employees working at any time. As you enter the store and your eyes begin to glaze over in anticipation of shiny products with fruit-shaped logos on them, remember how to properly approach another human being.

For starters, find an employee who is not already in deep conversation with another customer. Should you not see any, look around the store for a central meeting place, such as a table that is roped off, with a few employees helping people who are in a line. Should there be a line, take your place and wait your turn. It is considered rude to interrupt a conversation for your own benefit.

Step 2: Getting What You Want
Begin your exchange of words with a “Hello” or “Excuse me.” The employee will acknowledge your presence and should respond with something resembling a “how may I help you?” remark. At this point, you should carry on, informing him or her of your reason for taking up square footage and patronizing such a classy establishment. They will then help you, and you will receive the product or service you desire!

Improper ways to approach an employee and begin conversation are below. These all happened today.

• Putting your hand up in the air, as to signal for a taxi cab. I do not know if you are signaling to me, your wife or kids, or a taxi cab. Use your words.
• Waiting until I look down at my handheld payment device to input data or swipe a card, and talking at me while I continue my conversation with the customer. Eye contact is not necessary to converse, nor must I make eye contact to ignore your presence. I will help you when my current interaction is complete.
• Rapping your fingers on a wooden table or bar and looking at me expectantly, while I am performing a work-related task on a computer. For all I know, you may have “I Gotta Feeling” stuck in your head and feel the need for artistic expression while staring inquisitively at the stainless steel walls. Again, use your words.
• Stating the name of a product when greeted. When you walk up to me and say “MacBook Pro, 2.53,” many things go through my head. You may want to see one, you may own one, you may hate everything about them, I don’t really know. What would you do if I approached you and (without as much as a hello, even) said “Joe Jonas” or “garbanzo bean?”

A quick reminder, too! Many employees are living, breathing beings who care (or pretend, at least) about your day and experience in their store. Should they initially ask “How are you?” when they say hello, a proper response includes words such as “Great” or “Horrendous.” It does not include the words “iTouch Eight Megabyte.” That part comes next.

Step Three: Leaving
When you receive your change, bag, and receipt, the employee will typically thank you and send well-wishes as you exit the store. It is always nice to return their “have a nice day” with a “you too” to show that you care, or at least pretend.

Hopefully these tips on how to present oneself in public have helped you, the consumer, act more like a human when you leave the house. Please attempt to follow such guidelines. Your fellow shoppers and retail employees will thank you.